So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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