Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
