Sorry, I don't speak sober.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
