i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
