I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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