Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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