Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I have post one night stand depression
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