i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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