theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bag of teeth...
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize