that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
