How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
