we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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