I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
