This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
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we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
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this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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