so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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