my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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