Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
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