Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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