So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
