Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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