so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Randomize
