Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
