I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
