Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
