I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize