hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize