i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize