We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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