I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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