it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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