all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
