He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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