You're so nebulous sometimes
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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