Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
