his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
