I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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