Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
