Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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