There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
