I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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