i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
