she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
