we made out on top of his cat.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
