Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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