yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
