I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
