fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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