the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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