i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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