i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
