that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
