my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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