The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
How does one acquire holy water?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
