Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
